Nothing says "unprofessional job" like wrinkes in duct tape

[mrpjantarctica is entirely to blame for this idea. My contribution was to recognise that the world market for it might be more than five. It's all about the marketing.]

Is there someone in your life whose boundless enthusiasm for fixing everything around them is matched only by their limited repertoire of skills and tools? The kind of person whose house is held together by string and cable ties, who believes there's nothing on God's earth that duct tape can't fix?

Stuck for something to buy them for Christmas?

Then get them the Bodger's Home Companion!

Contents:

• One large roll of gaffer tape. Obviously.
• A can of WD-40.
• A job lot of rubber bands, cable ties and Jubilee clips, in a variety of sizes.
• A not-terribly-good multitool. I'm thinking one of these.
• A ball of string.
• A tube of epoxy resin.
• A short book, "101 Great [insert nationality here]¹ Bodges", containing instructions for a wide variety of half-arsed home and automotive repairs.

The de luxe version would also contain self-amalgamating tape and heatshrink sleeving, and possibly a soldering iron.

What have I forgotten?

A great advantage of the BHC over other novelty Christmas gift items is that it really doesn't matter if you get given three of them, there being no such thing as too much gaffer tape.

¹ Possibly some slight adjustments would be needed for different markets, but I reckon you could get a long way just by changing the title. I'm thinking of something more useful and less stupid than the output of the Duct Tape Guys. We would, of course, need a fearsomely comprehensive disclaimer of liability.